Marriage Adventures: The Secret to an Extraordinary Life Together
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In , Wilson was first published by Herbert Jenkins , and the novels included titles in the Sir Leonard Wallace series and others in the crime, romance, comedy and thriller genres. He also published under two other pseudonyms. Between and , under the name "Michael Chesney", he wrote a trilogy of further spy novels of imperial adventure, featuring Colonel Geoffrey Callaghan, Chief of Military Intelligence as the central character. It would appear that his last two novels were published by Herbert Jenkins in Wilson wrote "forceful, exciting, thrilling, vibrant, vivid, intriguing, daring" stories, all adjectives used by reviewers in the Telegraph , Observer , Scotsman and Times Literary Supplement , with the Mail saying his work was "among the best".
This time he is kidnapped, put in a trunk, and successfully impersonated by Sir Leonard Wallace, Chief of the intelligence service. This comes at the end of an exciting love-duel in which one of our younger agents has to seduce a beautiful Austrian baroness, who fortunately turns out to be on our side all the time".
It is believed they bigamously married in Lahore some time in When they returned to England in , Wilson left Dorothy and their baby son Michael in London and returned to his first legitimate wife and family, now in Southampton. He stayed with them for only 18 months. In , Wilson moved to London, telling Gladys and family that he would find a place for them all to live.
Instead, he returned to Dorothy. In , Michael, at the age of 73, began an investigation into his father's past. When setting out on his career as an actor and poet, Michael had changed his name by deed poll to "Mike Shannon". When he was only nine years old his mother and her family told him his father had been killed in the Battle of El Alamein and he did not discover the truth until Alexander Wilson's son by his second marriage, Michael, suspected his father was involved in intelligence activities as an agent in the s and s.
He based this supposition on his memory of seeing his father meet Joachim von Ribbentrop at the German Embassy in Carlton House Terrace ,  London in the spring of , and other meetings with mysterious men to whom his father spoke fluent German. In , Wilson told his third wife, Alison, that MI6 had decided he should go into the field as an agent.
He said his subsequent misadventures, including being declared bankrupt, though never discharged, and being jailed for petty theft, were part of the cover he had to adopt for operational reasons. In May , a second tranche of Foreign Office files connected with intelligence matters was released to The National Archives at Kew. The file revealed that the translator of Hindustani, Persian and Arabic had joined the service in October and been dismissed from the SIS in October It was reported that he had faked a burglary at his flat and been in serious trouble with the police.
A fabricator, such as this man was, is a great public danger". In the mids, when Wilson was working as a hospital porter, he met and married a nurse, Elizabeth Hill, with whom he also had a child. Wilson died of a heart attack on 4 April , aged 69, in Ealing , and is buried in Milton cemetery, Portsmouth , with a tombstone describing him as an author and patriot, and the quotation from Shakespeare's Othello : "He loved not wisely but too well". Wilson had seven children with his four wives.
It was only in that these half-siblings and their families began meeting each other. The actress Ruth Wilson , daughter of Nigel, is one of his grandchildren,  and discovered that the children of Mike Shannon were also professionals in playwriting, film-making and drama education. Ruth Wilson was also an executive producer of the series. Now, the world is our home and this is where we share our discoveries and lessons learned along the way.
All potentially true except for the too clean part. We just like to tidy up before we invite you into our home. Neither of us are overly talented, smart, rich, lucky, or retired. We have zero shame in admitting we want to squeeze as much out of life as possible. For us, life is an adventure. There are plenty of opinions about how one should go about life, travel, adventure and everything in between. As for us, we like to travel with the comforts of home.
We believe comfort and minimalism can, and do, coexist. Perpetual travel is a lifestyle for us, not an ongoing vacation. Vacations are short term, a means of escaping the day to day. Because our home is our vessel, it makes long term travel more sustainable and vice-versa the more of our planet we see, the more we want to preserve it. Yet, we feel like we have more than ever before. The pain of an unfaithful spouse is devastating, but God's grace can still give us hope. Greg, Erin and John give some tips for confessing secrets to your spouse. Featuring Chris and Cindy Beall.
Marriage is hard work. Throw in a few kids and it can be extra, extra hard work. Plus, you'll hear why all of us are advocates for marriage counseling, how we split up household chores, creative ways we make time for our spouses, and April's three guiding questions for couples who work opposite schedules. Like what you heard? Visit coffeeandcrumbs.
And, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on iTunes! The giggles and chit chat are at an all time high as we reconnect after our long three month break from podcasting. Rank 1: Cunnilingus -- How to please her. Cunnilingus is an essential part of pleasing your woman. Listen in to a frank, helpful discussion of this essential part of love and sex. Couples in committed relationships fall into certain traps and mistakes. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples' therapist Dr. What are the keys for building trust, at any stage in your relationship?
What can you do to amplify the things that are going right in your relationship? What has research revealed about the secrets that make love last? And what can new parents do to ensure that their relationship stays strong even as it changes with the new addition to the family? John Gottman. In his second visit to the Relationship Alive podcast see Episode 1 for his first visit , John Gottman offers answers to these questions and more expert wisdom on how to take your relationship skills to the next level.
Trust is the core issue for new relationships. People new to their relationships are constantly wondering: Do you have my back? Can I trust you? Will you be there for me? The majority of arguments and conflicts are, at their core, about trust. Trust is absolutely essential to build safety in a relationship new or old.
It is only from this knowing that you are being cared for as much as you are caring for, and being loved and appreciated as much as your are loving and appreciating, that you can withstand the risks, doubts, and conflicts that inevitably arise in partnerships. Build your trust metric: Trust is something to care take and to cultivate. It is an aspect of the relationship that needs continual attention. Really hear them when they are sad, angry, disappointed, etc. Listen with curiosity and openness and respond from this place, rather than from defensiveness or a desire to dismiss.
In fact, with adequate connection and empathy, conflict can be constructive in leading to creative problem solving. Let your partner know that you are going to be there, even when they are upset with you. Turn the screens off and make time to listen and be with your partner with your whole heart and attention.
Good relationships require trust and commitment. Commitment is absolutely necessary for building safety in a relationship.
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Couples that do not build this kind of investment in their relationship, or who make negative comparisons to other relationships, end up betraying the relationship. In fact, this alone is a predictor of infidelity. Check in with yourself frequently and ask yourself if you are thinking that the grass might be greener with someone else, or if you are starting to meet needs outside of the relationship through others.
Remember- commitment is about loving THIS person- all the good and the bad. Choose gratitude instead of resentment. Given that negative comparisons to others begins the cascade to betrayal, be sure to return often to gratitude for all you share, experience, and love about your partner and your relationship. Resentments and conflict are inevitable, however do not let this set the tone of your love. Look for the unique aspects of your partner that you can cherish. During times when you are having a harder time accessing this love, try to be honest. Avoiding conflict and avoiding self-disclosure threatens commitment and leads to infidelity.
Nurture and cherish! Be ready and willing to invest and sacrifice for your partner. Dare to care more about their well-being than your own over time these become one and the same. Happy and strong couples tend to: Say I love you and mean it! Kiss passionately! Give romantic gifts! Show affection in public! Have a weekly date! Prioritize sex! Stay friends! Make time for each other! In conclusion- they engage in behaviors that foster oxytocin which increases pair bonding, and builds a deep sense of safety. You can be great friends and great lovers: The essential elements are simple- keep touching each other and keep connecting emotionally.
Kiss each other for no reason, cuddle, be affectionate, say I love you… Bring your sexual connection alive by remembering that we are always on a continuum of exchanging sexual energy. Find opportunities for connection and affection throughout the day- while making coffee, brushing your teeth, etc.
Basically, everything positive you do in your relationship is foreplay! Imagine that! Continue to invest in each other. Use babysitters and family, or trade time with another couple for child care. Get away for overnights. Take long drives. Check in with each other and commit to your connection. Stay friends throughout the difficulty because your relationship is the cradle in which your child will develop- so you want to make sure it is as healthy as possible.
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Make meaning: We humans are meaning makers and storytellers. To thrive in your relationship and to feel that juicy sense of endless connection it is important to create mutual meaning. While these can feel like existential questions, they are also very concrete.
Perhaps lighting candles at dinner feels good, or a shared morning walk, or an adventure now and then… Be intentional with your findings, knowing well that what gives meaning will inevitably change throughout your life together. Check out what is happening now! How do you sustain attraction in your relationship over the long term? And, what can you do if your partner no longer feels attracted to you?
John Gottman and Sue Johnson have both been with us here on the podcast before, and our conversation today will reveal to you some surprising, well-researched truths about what fuels the spark in your relationship. The good news: While most relationships go through difficult times in which one or both partners can feel disconnected, the good news is that desire and connection can be rebuilt.
This is almost always the case, even after a major betrayal. That said, while most couples can go from disinterest and disengagement to passion, it is difficult to find desire from a place of disgust.
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If, however, it is just that the attraction has waned then there is much to rediscover and rekindle! Not quite feeling it? Are you experiencing a lack of desire in your relationship? Does it seem like the spark is dim? Research shows that when desire is missing it is due to the fact that one is not being responsive to their partner. It is not, as many assume, caused by a deficiency in your partner but rather in yourself.
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So much of what we experience in relationships is a reality of our own making. While this realization can feel daunting and humbling, it is also the key to feeling empowered and remembering we are agents of change. Unpack low desire and understand where the shutdown is coming from: A decrease in attraction to your partner should be viewed as a symptom, rather than a cause. You have to unpack the symptom of not being a attracted and look at the anatomy of it. What is at the core root of this? What might be causing this reaction? Often it has to do with responsiveness and the following trio of relationship dimensions: The Trio: Responsiveness is the key to rekindling passion and connection in a relationship.
Responsiveness can be broken down into the following trio of key relationship dimensions: Building Trust: Trust is built through attunement and transparency. There should be no hidden agendas or secrets. You must take care to see each other and to truly listen. Listen reflectively, with compassion versus defensiveness.
go Building Commitment: The key to building commitment is to make positive comparisons to real or imagined alternatives. You can build commitment by cherishing your partner and what you have and by nurturing gratitude for what you have together. When, instead you do the opposite and make negative comparisons to real or imagined alternatives you begin on a pathway of nurturing resentment for what is missing in the relationship and you begin on the pathway towards betrayal.
Come back often to gratitude and appreciation for what is. Building Physiological Calm: Building physiological calm is a complex thing, however it is the crucial third leg of the stool that makes relationships solid, satisfying, and sustainable. Find mutual ways of relating to each other that are soothing and non-arousing. Through collaboration and togetherness you can create an experience of co-regulation in which you can feel calm, playful, and open.
Respond to your partner: This trio of attunement, commitment, and calm must be constantly tended to. This tuning in will in fact increase your attraction and your sense of closeness. By actively cherishing your partner you actively build passion! Post-betrayal growth: Growth and reconnection are possible even after the most difficult of experiences.
In the case, however, of trauma - which many affairs can create - trust will not be rekindled unless the symptoms and effects of PTSD are addressed. PTSD- which involves a constellation of symptoms and emotions, is a natural reaction that occurs when someone is faced with an experience that overwhelms their ability to manage in a regulated way.
To address PTSD for partners who have been betrayed due to an affair there must be a supportive process that involves the following 3 phases: Atonement- The person who had the affair needs to listen openly and compassionately to their hurt partner and begin to create an emotional bridge Attunement- Strengthen the bridge and build trust by listening to each other and navigating conflict with non-judgement and non-reactivity.
Really hear each other and work through accumulated regrettable instances that have not yet been processed in the relationship Attachment- Invest in the relationship- commit to each other daily and rebuild through responsiveness. When we do so we are not open or willing to be vulnerable, and this leads to feeling unfulfilled and imagining the grass as greener elsewhere.
You can do something about this! Tune back in. Truly listen. As you invest more attention and intention in the relationship you will begin to see your partner through fresher and more appreciative eyes, therefore making the grass over there less green and inviting. Keep stoking the fire- That incredible sense of being in love does not have an expiration date or a shelf life! You can keep this spark going indefinitely. Put this list on your fridge! Celebrate it and become an expert at it! Make it your own!
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Choose your partner each day, and remind them time and time again that they are the one you choose, they are the love of your life. And then Lost attraction? Attraction can be lost for many different reasons. This can be so painful that people start to feel helpless and begin to grieve and give up. If you are feeling less attracted to your partner, ask yourself if perhaps you are caught in a dance of disconnection.
Pull towards: Attraction is about much more than sexuality! Attraction is about being pulled towards someone. We are drawn in by their presence, their openness, and their responsiveness. Disconnection happens in all relationships. Feeling disconnected and then losing a sense of attraction happens often- the key is not to avoid this, but rather to know how to turn it back on.
Pull your partner in. What do you do to help pull your partner towards you? How do you help make them feel safe and connected? Openness and receptiveness are part of the basis of building secure bonds and can help put your partner at ease. Risk being vulnerable by sharing how you feel with transparency and responsibility. I have this longing just to feel you close to me and to know that I have your attention. It is scary for me when I feel this distance between us.
Sharing in this way can allow the two of you to heal each other and learn from each other so you can reconnect and this alone usually solves the problems. This emotional dance of responsiveness and synchronicity is intoxicating, and leads to the most rewarding moments in human life. Finding these moments with your partner will re-engage them out of shutdown. We are wired to feel thrill when we are reached for. Relationships that cultivate connection thrive because they have the safety needed for play and new possibilities of intimacy. In fact, you can mess up often as long as you are dedicated to creating repairs after ruptures.
Do not let your relationship run on empty- find ways, daily, to fill up your tank by giving each other time and attention. Do things together! Be together!
Love each other up! Father-daughter relationships can be very different than father-son relationships. Danny and John chat about how fathers can be protective of their daughters and make them feel special. Featuring Dr. In a conversation centered on their book Put the Disciple Into Discipline, Erin MacPherson and her mother, Ellen Schuknecht, discuss the importance of parents demonstrating love in the midst of disciplining their children.
Erin and Ellen also talk about teaching our kids self-control, helping them and ourselves become slow to anger, and faith training. This is the oral sex episode subscribers have been begging me for. Today, I'm opening up my vault of secret blow job tips to give you my most powerful ways to please your man with your mouth.
Yes, some of these fellatio tips are outrageous and possibly a little too "out there" for some, but if do you use them, you'll be VERY happy with the results. Show Highlights 2.